i might not update in the next couple of weeks. I'm thinking of taking a longer time out from my main projects. Its not really school. More that I feel like utter shit right now... anxiety is taking the upper hand and not being able to visualize it on paper completely destroys me. I never doubted myself as hard as that. When I visited my father today and asked him how he practised realistic art and anatomy drawing, he told me that he did and still does it as a hobby. He never really felt the need to do it professionally... and I think that's what I'm missing. Really, I want to get better so badly, to the point where I started hating and doubting myself, because I'm shit at drawing anatomy. And I forgot the reason I'm doing all this in the first place. Because I had fun... but I reached a point where I want to draw more than just creatures... and every time I see a great artist, who can nail the human body, I get frustrated, because I require a lot of effort for something that is far from perfect... and I don't want that... so yeah, time out for me. I want to have freaking fun again. Everything seems forced at the moment!